Beautiful, really beautiful. I love the dark tone: “till the wind was breathless” and the image of scalpels — mirrored by these shadowed lines against the shapes of clouds.
What an effortless transformation of heart into sky. I think the addition of postcard image is a great device, though I’m not sure it’s necessary — or even helpful — for the poem.
As co-editor of the site, my comments on posts will be minimal. But I just wanted to say how much I like this one. I’m a v-p of the local Audubon society in the difficult position of fighting to put the brakes on an out-of-control, heavily subsidized wind industry trying to run roughshod over local officials with disastrous effects on wildlife and wildlife habitat. That said, I do find wind turbines graceful and interesting. I’ve never seen two-bladed ones before. And I’m impressed by how effectively you convey the mixed feelings many of us enviros have about wind plants, with language about scalpels and broken clocks. I’m not saying that that was your intent, necessarily, but that in capturing this literal ambiguity you cut to the heart of a dilemma. Thank you, Jo.
– Dave Bonta
Thanks very much everybody. Dave, yes, I was responding to how (ironically) inorganic these strange windturbines are, how they blight the landscape. It’s not too bad in France but in Spain they are everywhere and are almost eery, a little like postapocalyptic survivors in that bleached, arid landscape. Sorry to hear they’re mucking up the mountain, it’s a difficult balance.
They do like like strange sentinels. Your words, and the photo, make them strangely beautiful. I could put up with some freaky wind towers if it meant cleaner air. We could always paint them!
Note to Blythe et al: Take a peek at the poet-artist matchup center, located at the bottom of the site, where you can find other poets and artists to work with on collaborative submissions.
Also, you can check out the attribution, share-alike Creative Commons images over on Flickr by going to Explore -> Creative Commons and then searching for images that have a share-alike license.
So don’t feel like you have to create the whole piece yourself. No way! We encourage collaboration between poets and artists. In fact, bunches of collaborators can work together on one submission. That’s part of what makes this joint so freaking awesome (if I may say so).
21 comments in “clouds”
August 19th, 2008 at 12:54 am
What a lovely idea! And your contribution is divine, Jo — I love the “hands of broken clocks.”
August 19th, 2008 at 2:05 am
Beautiful, really beautiful. I love the dark tone: “till the wind was breathless” and the image of scalpels — mirrored by these shadowed lines against the shapes of clouds.
August 19th, 2008 at 4:15 am
Good idea! And I liked this poem very much too.
August 19th, 2008 at 4:54 am
Great job, JO. You nailed the image
August 19th, 2008 at 4:59 am
What an effortless transformation of heart into sky. I think the addition of postcard image is a great device, though I’m not sure it’s necessary — or even helpful — for the poem.
August 19th, 2008 at 5:47 am
As co-editor of the site, my comments on posts will be minimal. But I just wanted to say how much I like this one. I’m a v-p of the local Audubon society in the difficult position of fighting to put the brakes on an out-of-control, heavily subsidized wind industry trying to run roughshod over local officials with disastrous effects on wildlife and wildlife habitat. That said, I do find wind turbines graceful and interesting. I’ve never seen two-bladed ones before. And I’m impressed by how effectively you convey the mixed feelings many of us enviros have about wind plants, with language about scalpels and broken clocks. I’m not saying that that was your intent, necessarily, but that in capturing this literal ambiguity you cut to the heart of a dilemma. Thank you, Jo.
– Dave Bonta
August 19th, 2008 at 8:55 am
gorgeous choice of image & incredible prose which says so much in such a short span of time. i hope you do more of these; i really enjoyed this one.
August 19th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Oh. Very nice.
August 19th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Now I’m afraid to try this out. This is real nice.
August 19th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
Thanks very much everybody. Dave, yes, I was responding to how (ironically) inorganic these strange windturbines are, how they blight the landscape. It’s not too bad in France but in Spain they are everywhere and are almost eery, a little like postapocalyptic survivors in that bleached, arid landscape. Sorry to hear they’re mucking up the mountain, it’s a difficult balance.
August 19th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
ps Rethabile, you’ve just come back from holiday, get those photos off the camera *grin*.
August 19th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
If Rethabile is scared to try, I am definitely biting my nails.
These are just too fabulous. I keep staring at my pictures and I have no words to go with them.
August 19th, 2008 at 6:50 pm
They do like like strange sentinels. Your words, and the photo, make them strangely beautiful. I could put up with some freaky wind towers if it meant cleaner air. We could always paint them!
August 19th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
I just read Rethabile and Blythe’s comments.
First of all, if I can do one, well… you can too.
Also, I wrote my words first, then looked for a photo on my computer to match.
August 19th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
Note to Blythe et al: Take a peek at the poet-artist matchup center, located at the bottom of the site, where you can find other poets and artists to work with on collaborative submissions.
Also, you can check out the attribution, share-alike Creative Commons images over on Flickr by going to Explore -> Creative Commons and then searching for images that have a share-alike license.
So don’t feel like you have to create the whole piece yourself. No way! We encourage collaboration between poets and artists. In fact, bunches of collaborators can work together on one submission. That’s part of what makes this joint so freaking awesome (if I may say so).
xoxo
Dana.
August 19th, 2008 at 9:50 pm
beautiful! image and words.
p.s. i’m with rethabile and blythe, my palms are sweating now.
August 20th, 2008 at 4:39 pm
I like the use of the verb “shuttled” here. It’s puzzling and lovely.
August 21st, 2008 at 2:51 am
Very interesting idea.
As to this poem, one (unsolicited) edit:
“left them [new line]
[omit: like] hands of …
August 21st, 2008 at 5:52 am
Yes, that’s a good edit. Thanks.
August 21st, 2008 at 5:53 am
ps thanks everybody else for stopping by but most of all thanks to Dana, and Dave, for starting this fabulous project.
August 27th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
jo — a haunting and beautiful piece that (and this is important) works without the image, too. wonderful!
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